Secret Orgasm Extender~ A girl's best friend!

My Sensational Secret Orgasm Extender~

Greedy girls pay attention: If you want a longer, deeper, more intense orgasm, you are at the right place. Considering the average female orgasm lasts between 15 and 30 seconds, it's not surprising that many women feel a little, well, cheated when it comes to coming.

Now imagine an orgasm that lasts a full 30 minutes, with the odd random contraction happening up to a day afterward. This was the astonishing promise of two U.S. sexologists who pioneered what's called the Extended Sexual Orgasm technique in the 80s. It was a pretty big claim -- and it got a pretty big response at the time. But just like the G-spot, when people couldn't figure out the whole orgasmic program in five minutes flat, it quickly and quietly disappeared into the “too complicated” basket… until now.
Sex therapists have recently resurrected Extended Sexual Orgasm (ESO) -- and are seeing some spectacular results. What's changed? The fact is, we're far more sex-savvy now than ever before.
So let's get started and learn together~

Step One:
Think positively about sex. Most of us, according to the sexologists, resist pleasure rather than welcome pleasure-- so in simple terms, this means thinking, “This is great -- let's go with it,” rather than “Oh God, my Mother would freak if she saw me now.”

Do Kegel pelvic floor exercises. For the uninitiated -- and where have you been? -- these involve squeezing, holding, then releasing the same muscle you use to stop the flow of urine. The idea is to strengthen your pubococcygeus muscles, and standard sets involve clenching and releasing 25 to 30 times, three times a day.

Pay attention when you masturbate. If you already know which strokes, speed, pressure and rhythms suit you, well done! Practice makes perfect!

Stage Two: With Your Partner

You lie down while he sits or kneels cross-legged beside or in between your legs. Next he should lightly brush and stroke you, but he's not allowed to stimulate the clitoris and inside the vagina. He does this for at least five minutes.
The stimulation now moves to the clitoris. He should slowly and steadily circle the clitoris with a finger, travelling around it once per second. At the same time, you tell him exactly what pressure and rhythm feels good.
As he continues to stimulate your clitoris, you start doing your pelvic floor squeezes as you breathe deeply from your stomach. Prepare for your orgasm, because now it gets a bit complicated for him.
As you feel you're about to climax, he should watch and feel for regular two-second contractions; this means you're about to orgasm. Once these contractions start, he needs to stop stimulating the clitoris and immediately move to stroking you. Using his fingers, he can either push them in and out, or sweep them in circles in and out of the entrance. If he concentrates more in the front (the bit underneath your tummy), stroking with his fore and middle finger is another option. Most crucial of all, whichever technique he chooses, the rhythm should be slow and steady.

After you've had your orgasm, he'll feel the vagina start to pull away - the point when most couples stop. But not this time! In ESO, your first orgasm is only the beginning, remember? Instead, he continues using his fingers inside the vagina, using a light touch initially, then upping the frequency and pressure once you feel ready for more. This should set off another series of contractions.
The minute he feels a pause in the pulsating, he should move quickly back to stroking the clitoris as before. If he continues to steadily circle the clitoris, this should trigger even more contractions - at which point he moves back to stimulating inside the vagina again. He then continues switching back and forth from vaginal to clitoral stimulation until your contractions occur every one to five seconds.
After doing this for 15 minutes, the contractions start to become continuous. When the vagina pushes out in a continual wave-like motion, you're in the final phase. He now gets into a position where he can use both hands -- and keep his balance -- to stimulate the clitoris and the vagina simultaneously. The result: wave after wave of orgasms.

…And to think we were all going to give up!

Marriage Tips; Want to improve your sex life?

"The worst thing that can happen to a relationship is that a sex life becomes routine and boredom sets in."

But in today's fast-paced life, filled with dueling responsibilities, a sub-par or absent sex life is a common problem. When physical problems are not the root cause of a diminished sex life, many remedies exist to rekindle the flame of passion.

Much of the fix is grounded in communication and reprioritizing one's life to make time for love and sex. Sometimes couples need to focus on addressing unresolved conflicts between them, while other spouses just need to remember to have fun when the weight of life's responsibilities drags them and their sex life down.

Still others may just need to build time into their schedules to be together and let nature take its course. Simply setting aside date nights can jump-start one's love life. Through communication—both verbal and non-verbal — and listening, couples come to understand what ignites that spark in the other partner. That might be cuddling, leaving love notes for your partner to find, meeting at a motel for a wild night, trying out new sex techniques, introducing a vibrator or dozens of other potential turn-ons.

Pointers on keeping the spark alive~

• Treat your partner as if you're dating
• Romance your spouse outside the bedroom
• Plan a date night
• Talk with your partner
• Listen to your partner
• Understand your partner's sexual needs and desires
• Keep physically fit and attractive for your partner
• Maintain perspective on sex as life comes and goes
• Resolve any old conflicts as they will spillover to the bedroom
• Have fun and engage in foreplay, whether that's kissing, sexual banter or anything else
• Be adventurous and creative in and outside the bedroom
• Exercise, preferably together
• Stop smoking and get your partner to quit
• Watch your weight and cholesterol

Marriage Tips; Create a lasting Romance~

Lasting Romance…
that elusive experience that comes and goes. When we have it we think it will last forever, when we don’t we worry that it will never come again. It is an experience that so many crave yet have had so little of in their lives.

True romance feels good. It should not frighten you. If it does not feel good to you then you are confusing romance with all the bad things that happens in dysfunctional relationships.

Do you remember how good it felt when you begin falling in love with your husband? The intensity of these good feelings come from our connection with our Source, from many spiritual beings, including our own Inner Being, radiating their enthusiasm and excitement that we have found
our heart’s desire.

This is why they are so powerful. Good feelings always result from being in alignment with the whole of our being and what we have been asking for.

If you already have romance in your life, whether it is a new
relationship or one that you have had for a while, you are in a very good place. Your dominant vibration is one of great happiness, great joy and great passion.

That means you have an incredible connection with your source. You should understand that this is responsible for many of the other wonderful things that are falling into place in your life right now. If you don’t have romance in your life, but you want it, then you are going to have to bring yourself to that place.

You are going to have to romance yourself. You are going to have to treat yourself wonderfully and give yourself love and nurturing and caring and bring yourself into a place of great joy and passion for life.

Who wants to be around an unhappy person? No one. Who wants to be around someone with misery in their life?
Very few people want that. If they do want that in their life, do you want them in yours?

So you have to take care of yourself. Look after yourself. Nurture and love yourself, take yourself out to dinner. Buy yourself wonderful things. Look in the mirror and flirt with yourself. Challenge the negative messages others have given you.

Find things within you that contradict those negative messages. You need to feel loveable for someone to want to love you and for you to let it in. If you are in a relationship now and it does not have the level of romance in it that you want or you want more from it, then you are the one who is going to have to create that.


You are going to have to make yourself more available for that. You are going to have to treat yourself better so that you are in a better feeling place so that you are more attractive to your partner.

And if this does not rekindle the flame in the heart of your partner it will repel them and attract one that is better suited to whom you are now.

Romance is about relationships and getting to know another person. It is about the discovery of your own beauty through the eyes of an attentive other. Part of what makes it feel good, of what keeps you open to receiving, is your recognition of qualities that you appreciate in this other person. It is your focus on the beauty you find in them.

What makes Romance go bad? When does it stop feeling good and start feeling bad? When you discover and focus on things you do not like in your husband. Focusing on negatives will only produce bad energy. Instead focus on positive, remember all of the reasons you fell in love and what
drew you to your spouse.

Accepting someone with all there faults is a positive trait for yourself. You also have faults that your spouse loves and accepts you for.

Only you have the ability to make your self unhappy, you hold the control in your life. You can only influence others lives, not control them. Most relationships suffer from a break down in focus way before any of the more serious problems occur. One event at a time each person notices something they don’t like in their partner. Then they focus
on it and make it a little bigger.

When you worry about something your partner did or does, and you tell others about how annoying it is, you are focusing your attention on it and you are shifting your vibration so that it matches those same unwanted behaviors. You are actually turning yourself into a magnet for more such experiences. Not only that but if you are telling others about it you are probably setting up resentments in them towards your partner. So now there are two people holding negative energy towards your partner.

Your friend may even begin to distance themselves from you because of the negative energy they perceive that you are making them feel. Can you see how this would affect you?
Can you see how this is not romantic energy you will be feeling, or even open to feeling if you are holding such thoughts in your mind?

Can you see how this would affect your partner? Creating such negative energy with your friends about your spouse only sets up the mindset that your friends will also have a negative outlook on your spouse. You are your spouses only defender, when you project support, love, and positive energy to others on behalf of your spouse it shows that you are, yourself in positive energy and a respectful relationship.

We all respond to our feelings and the feelings we pick up from others much more than we consciously realize. These feelings push and pull us, most don’t know why they go where they do, but yet they do go. Your work is to become conscious of the energies at play in your life and romantic relationships give you plenty of chances to generate the widest variety of feelings.

Negativity that you feel towards your partner will be noticed. Most people are not aware enough to turn away from this negativity so you are likely to arouse similar negativity within them or push them away from you if they do not wish to engage in them.


If your partner did something you did not like, of course you will feel bad. But the solution, the answer to the desire that is born from that event, comes from focusing on what you do desire. You don’t do battle with the problem, you turn away from it and walk towards what you do want, which is a positive side. Showing support and positive energy will resolve you wanting to focus on the negative feeling you have.

When I am having a negative feeling about my husband I stay focused on many things about him that I love and appreciate. I focus on some of the romantic vacations we have taken together and on all of the many ways that he makes me happy and works hard to provide for our
family.

Here is where so many relationships go wrong. When you hold on to past issues....
There is this accumulation process that most people do when
something hurts them, they hang on to it and when other painful events occur at later times those old hurts also come to the foreground and receive focus. Even though I know how destructive this can be, I still catch myself doing it.

When I know that my husband is having a bad day I am more
understanding when he gets agitated easily, or perhaps says hurtful things on the whim. I try to focus on positive things that he does for me, or something funny he has done recently. This give me more compassion in the moment that he is unhappy.

I also reminded myself that I am a good partner. I treat him well, I have done nothing wrong. All of these thoughts helped me to feel better about myself and remain centered.


Things like this used to cause us many hours or even days of
disconnection. I am certain that the shift I made in my energy made the difference in this case.
So often people think that the romance in their life is due to the things they do. I know it is easy to believe this.
However, if your actions are not in alignment with your thoughts and feelings then you are only wasting your energy and cutting yourself off from your Source.

These are very helpful, but the actions you take must be inspired actions; inspired by the love and appreciation you have for your partner.

So keep seeking out those things to admire and appreciate
in your partner and in yourself.

Women on Sex

Women on Sex......

As I am now into my early 30's I can openly say, that my sexual appetite is not only strong but I am more understanding of what my needs are.

I grew up in a house that we never discussed sex... it was the "forbidden" topic. I thought up until I was 12 that I could get pregnant just from a french kiss. I never got into the whole bar scene until I was in my mid to late 20's. To this day I can say that I have never had a one night stand... does that mean that I am inexperienced? NO, I have chosen not to have sex with men that would leave me with nothing... I do have standards, I do have morals, and I do like myself therefore I never felt that I need the self-esteem booster of one nighters.

Looking back into my 20's I do not believe that I really knew how to satisfy myself. I did not know what I desired, or how to express what felt good. I just ... had sex!

Women that are afraid, insecure or not forthcoming about what they desire are not being fully satisfied... find a way to start emerge out of your shell. To be able to achieve ultimate gratification is an amazing feeling.

Start by simply having some alone time, get to know your body. Start with your head down to your toes, touching, caressing, finding your sensations. Your body is beautiful, love yourself and learn to please yourself. I found the best way for me to feel sexy is a hot bubble bath, a glass of wine, candles and music.

When I am feeling sexy I can be more adventurous with myself. I like to touch my soft long legs, I like to touch my breasts... discovering my body. When you know what feels good by yourself you can then guide your partner.

After you have been married for years, it seems that couples tend to lose their ambition to "please" each other. I get so sick of "guickies" to the point that I do not want to have sex. It amazes me that the most important person in your life is the one that you take the most advantage of. We get so caught up in everyday life, that we forget to put the brakes on and enjoy each other.

My favorite time alone with my husband is usually when I do the planning. I enjoy setting up surprises! I like to do things for him that I know he will enjoy... I like to do the unexpected. When you have a routine in your relationship, you can get bored and be left with the feeling that you are not desired. I suggest to think about what your husband likes, maybe just ask a few questions from time to time. Remember your fantasies as well, men find it very sexy when we are confident and sharing.

Marriage Tips: Romance and Sex

Let's start with the word "romance." Romance isn't the fanciful thing we've been led to believe. Romance is really just showing love to your spouse without I repeat without being asked. And yes, both men and women need romance.

So what I'm saying is that your marriage should be filled with romance on a daily basis. It shouldn't wait until the one day of the year where it's "required," so as to stay out of the dog house.

Show your spouse that you love them on a consistent basis.

Don't wait until you feel like it or until they supposedly deserve it. Otherwise you'll find that love won't have a place whatsoever in your marriage.

Here are 4 very very easy things you can do to start a little romance in your marriage:

1. Go to Hallmark.com and send an e-card on a non-holiday. I did it to my husband and it's very easy. And take notice that you can schedule the e-cards for future delivery. )hint... hint...)
2. Call your spouse on the phone in the middle of the day, just to say "I was thinking about you and wanted to say hi." Guys, I am telling you!!! This will put the biggest smile on your wives face... she will be gloating in no time~
3. Write a short phrase like "I love you," "I'm glad you're my wife," or "I'm proud to be your husband" on a sticky note and leave it where you know they'll find it later.
4. I just simply love sending my husband either naughty or sweet little text messages during the day. I want him to know how much I think of him and appreciate him. And the naughty ones.... how would you like to be in a meeting and get a little message on what your wife wants you to do to her when you get home... it adds a little excitement.

That's it! No need to get overly complicated. Just start by doing some small things that show your spouse that you truly love them and that your marriage is important to you. Guys, we are very easy~ Very easy to please... All we want is to feel and know that we are loved, appreciated and of course desired sexually. If you can make your wife feel like she is the sexiest woman alive~ Guaranteed you will have an amazing sex life. And you can never go wrong sending flowers. Every woman love the surprise of getting flower... for no reason.. just a "I love you."

Marriage Tips: Intimacy~

Don’t believe the jokes you’ve heard about passionate marriage: "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married, and by then it was too late." Or “The longest sentence you can form with two words: ‘I do.’" Many professional studies in my opinion have missed the mark on marriage -- at least as far as sex and intimacy are concerned.

Sex researchers have found that passionate marriage is alive and well; in fact, marriage is where the best and most satisfying sex is happening in America. Married couples have more sex, more varied sex (including oral sex) -- and more emotionally and physically satisfying sex -- than singles. When sex works well, it can add a great deal to how happy couples feel about their lives -- as much as a 15% to 20% increase in satisfaction.

When passionate marriage works well, it works very, very well. However, when it doesn’t work well, it’s awful. When sex works badly, it can take away 50% to 70% of marital satisfaction.

Don’t Settle for Less Than a Passionate Marriage

Yes, there is work in trying to create or sustain a passionate marriage. But it doesn’t mean your marriage is in trouble if you are feeling less passionate or if sex is less exciting than when you first met each other. That is inevitable -- infatuation fades and sexual boredom is a given in marriage.

But you don’t have to settle for less than a passionate marriage. With careful attention and a little creativity, you can keep the home fires burning.

How to Reconcile Sex and Passion With Domesticity

It is the dilemma of modern relationships: reconciling security and adventure -- eroticism and domesticity -- in the same place. We live decades longer than we did a century ago, and we expect to have sex and passion, both for pleasure and connection -- not just reproduction -- for the rest of our lives, too.

“Expectations are over the top. We want security and financial support, and the best friend and trusted confidant -- and a passionate lover -- all in one.” So is passionate marriage impossible? “Yes, as a sustained thing. Passion comes and goes with many changes.”

People have the mistaken idea that if there is “sexual chemistry” then good sex doesn’t take work. That’s simply wrong. The chemicals don’t make for good sex -- nor do they get “used up.” To keep passion flowing rather than fading away in a relationship takes work -- on yourself as an individual and work together as a couple. And the best time to start is before the flames are out.

Marriage Tips: Woman, marriage and sex.

Marriage and sex is a topic of conversation that I hear over and over. Men are consistenly complaining that their wives are not interested in sex. "After we got married, had kids, got older, the sex just stopped." Men are complaining that their wifes do not want to have sex, and women are complaining that their men are not giving them kind of sex they desire. It seems that everyone has gotten so caught up in complaining, the thought of actually doing something to repair there sex life is unthinkable.

I have a great idea... how about trying to ask your wife what YOU can be doing differently to make her want to have sex. I am here to tell you, women want sex just as much as men. We are easy... we just want your attention! Your undivided attention. We want to feel sexy, we want to feel desired, we want you to flirt with us like you do with the cute girl at the supermarket. It is not rocket science! If you could give us half the attention that you put into making your boss happy, we would be calling our girlfriends bragging with excitment. This is how affairs happen, men and women just get too lazy to actually change their own relationship. The easiest solution, if my husband/wife isn't meeting my needs then someone else will.

Communication is a facet in many parts of your marriage. You talk about the kids, money, entertainment and your friends... what about your sex life?

A healthy open sex life is the best cure for many issues in your life. When I am having a bad day and my husband gives me that little extra attention it makes everything feel so much better.

What about romance? What is romance anyways.... For women we see this soap opera fantasy romance and wonder why we are not as sexually desired by our husbands.

I know first hand how hard it is to tell our husbands exactly what we need sexually. Years ago I told my husband that I needed more "romance" sexually. His typical question is "what do you mean?" This is a man that can take apart any engine and construct a massive building but cannot figure out how to romance his wife... perhaps he did have some manuals. Do men need manuals for romance? We are their manuals, however much we hate that they do not have the natural instinct to just "know" what we want and need, this is a part of keeping your marriage healthy and have an amazing sex life.

I eventually gave up on my husband after his "ridiculing" comments on me wanting more romance. I felt that I did not need to lead him by the hand step by step. After all, I go out of my way to catch little clues on things that make him happy. I had the typical idea that he should just be interested in going out of his way to be more romantic. I married a man this is overactive, he consistently has about 15 different projects going on at one time which non of them are close to completion. So needless to say, my whining about romance is the least of his concerns.

My expections of romance are now just lost in my head, causing me to get jealous when my friends tell me what there husbands do for them.

My life use to revolve around my husband. I would do absolutely anything, anytime for him. I thrived on making him happy and I would justify it by saying "I am just the nurturing kind, it makes me happy to take care of him." So I had exptations set so high that there was not anway he could ever be romantic enough.

Giving up on something that you desire leaves an emptiness within you. I never brought up my feelings on how much I was needing romance again. We have a great sex life and just like many others we go through phases of our sex life ranging from the exciting, flirting, can't wait to have sex to the less exciting "you just wanna do it!"

A healthy sex life is extremely important through out your marriage. But it cannot be just one partner working at it, both must have the desire to please the other endlessly. I am using romance as the example of womens desires, this is not always the case. Each woman is different and I am sorry men but it is your husbandly duties to know what your wife needs sexually. If you do not know... take the time to figure it out.

I think of it as, kind of like taking care of your automobile. You would never drive your vehicle without some kind of maintenance right? And many men would never drive their vehicle without adding some sort of "accessories." I know from my husband that any time he is adding anything to his truck he spends hours reading, surfing the internet, talking to his buddies, and researching. So I would like to hear a logical answer why men cannot figure out how to just give that little bit of romance we are needing? I do not need every day of the week to be filled with endless romance. But I do need the out of the blue, something that I am not expecting, thrill me, sweep me off my feet romantic night. I am still at a loss on how to get this...

I do however refuse to allow my frustration and disappointment of not being fullfilled romantically to interefere with our sex life. I love sex! I will say it again... I love sex!!! I love sex with my husband! Of course every encounter is not the "wow" that was amazing... but on average it is incredible.

You are going to get out of any situation what you put into it. I want to make the most of every experience in my life for the rest of my life. It has taken me a very long time to figure that out. I do not want to complain, I do not want to make huge issues out of minor things. Pick your battles in your marriage. My husbands grandma told me the best thing last summer, she said "fertilize the grass you have." I believe that if more people spent a little extra time putting effort into their marriages there would not be so many divorces.